The journey of a widowed Southern lady stranded in the Mid-west surviving the
perils and pearls of grief, adult children, grandchildren, writing, retirement, and assorted crises.
Saturday, August 6, 2011
Where Did the Week Go?
Dave and Becca will move into their new apartment probably Wednesday. It hasn't been a problem. We get along generally. Sarah keeps us on our toes. If it gets hectic, they get out and go somewhere and I have some quiet time or I get out and go. Right now, they are out. Becca's dad had to have surgery this past week. They recently found he had cancer and is not home. Not sure what the prognosis is but they think they got it all.
I've been working on a sundress for Sarah. I am still doing the no pattern sewing using up my "scraps". I don't think I could do it for myself but with Sarah being so thin and virtually the same from chest to hips it isn't really hard at all. I want to get all this small pieces of fabric used up so I can do some other things.
The writer's group met Thursday night, three of the six, at Panera. It was nice to get out of the house and it wasn't feasible to have it here, although Dave and Becca left for several hours so we could have come here. I don't know where the group is headed. We like to get together but it seems something is always interfering. It isn't a large group so two or three not making it is half the group. I do think we all find it a break from our usual routine and that it gives us a needed boost to talk about what is going on with us.
I had pain all night in my leg and did not sleep well at all. I woke to overcast skies and then rain. By noon, the rain cleared, the sun came out and hell opened it's mouth. It is hot. It went from 75 to 85 in a very short time and the humidity is unbelievable. At the moment, my back is aching and I'm tired. I'm going to shift or move and try to ease it. I hope your weekend is going well. Stay cool!
Thursday, August 4, 2011
More Oddballs and Idiots
Link
I could come up with a catchy comment but it wouldn't not be nice so I'll stay silent.
Monday, August 1, 2011
Week Begins
We, meaning me, Mike and Phyllis, went to church yesterday and it was nice to be back. I woke feeling better than I had in weeks. We went to lunch afterward and came home around 1:30. I was exhausted for some reason and went to bed immediately. I watched a few shows but my head neck had begun to hurt a bit. I took a nap only to wake around 4 p.m. with a migraine. I finally too an imetrix and applied an ice pack. Around 7 p.m. the headache was gone. We did not go to church. I went back to bed, still tired and watched t.v. shows until around 11 when I felt so sleepy I couldn't stay awake.
This morning, my head feels as if it might like to hurt again. I hope not. The one yesterday was the first in a long time but fall is probably upon us and that is usually the very worst time of year for my headaches.
I wish it would rain. It is hot and dry and just all around unpleasant. I have not been able to sit outside all summer because of it. No point in having a nice porch or patio in this weather.
Now I'm about to dash off to work. I never look forward to it. Thirteen years at this job this year. Seven doesn't sound like a long time and I know it probably won't be but I'll be 62 if God allows me to live that long. I don't think about it. Jerry and I talked about the things we would like to do once he retired. He was seven years older so would get there first and he liked pointing it out. But it never happened. So, I try not to think that far ahead.
Time to leave. Do try and stay cool if your weather is like the mid-west weather. Currently, it is 73 outside but the house is not very cool.
Sunday, July 31, 2011
I Should Have Been Named Pauline
Saturday my house would not get cool. It was 81 inside and humid. Outside it was 94 and humid. I finally broke down and called a repairman at time and a half.... $75 an hour plus half that. My air conditioner was frozen up. He said it probably has a leak and needs repair. Since it was the weekend it wasn't possible. I also have a duct blocked, the bathroom duct. Apparently some brilliant soul dumped debris into it.
So, tomorrow they will come out again, at regular rates, and attempt to repair the air conditioner. They'll look at the vent, too. I'm supposed to try and vacuum it out. I'm too tired!
I'm worn out and feel as if I've not stopped running for weeks. Phyllis is still here. She is thinking about going back to work by Wednesday. She is doing much better and getting adjusted to her medicines. I don't know how she is going to afford them but she has to have it.
Dave and Becca are in the midst of a move and they may have to stay a few nights since the complex they are moving to said there were delays in some material for the remodel. It will be a lovely place for them but they were annoyed by the delay.
Now, I'm going. I'm just too tired to try and come up with something to say. It all seems pretty disastrous anyway so not much fun to relate.
Friday, July 29, 2011
Odd Balls and Idiots
mind you. Thank goodness. No, other folks. Like this fellow who was
was found recently. This isn't the first time I've heard of this
happening. Still, I'm curious to know what he was thinking. We shall
never know for certain. I suppose he thought he'd get out as easy as
he got in.
http://www.channel3000.com/news/28681146/detail.html
And what about this one?
http://newstalkcleveland.com/white-house/were/aspiring-fashion-designer-found-dead-under-a-tree/
What was she doing up there? Was it a fig tree? Did she need the
leaves for something she was designing?
I like this one. Please note the second sentence of the second
paragraph.The aren't sure?
http://seattletimes.nwsource.com/html/localnews/2003333272_webbody31.html
The next one puzzles me as much as the first. What was she thinking?
http://www.kxan.com/dpp/news/local/Body-of-missing-woman-found-in-air-duct
Here we have a sad case but still, how does such things happen? People
complained, no one listened, now they make it sound as if they didn't
complain loudly enough? Obviously, the surviving man is disturbed but
how in the world can one over look a corpse in the living room?
http://www.guardian.co.uk/uk/2010/apr/20/lodger-body-hidden-sheltered-housing
This lady apparently stores former boyfriends. I want to know if the
current one knew about the last one.
http://www.independent.co.uk/news/mummified-body-found-in-cupboard-1270263.html
I wondered just how strange life can get after reading the first
story. I'm now certain that truth is far stranger and aberrational
than fiction.
People, a lot of people, are crazy.
I feel very normal.
Wednesday, July 27, 2011
Mid-Week Slump
nothing on the internet that is interesting."
It's true. I'm at work and have a moment to catch my breath. I
wondered what I could find on the web that might be interesting to
read or just look at. Could not think of a single thing. Seriously.
Last thing I want is to surf.
What I'd really like is a nap. I'm so tired. I didn't get to bed as
early as I wanted. I did lie down when I got home and sort of dozed a
bit. But my back started hurting around 9 and I had to take an ice
pack to bed. I watched a couple of shows and kept having to shift the
ice pack around an reposition myself.
In fact, my current state is so bad that this post is boring me!
Really. So, with that in mind, I'm going to drift off and see if I can
find something to peak my interest.
Monday, July 25, 2011
Update on Phyllis' Condition
which I will deliver here. My sister Phyllis' condition is improving
and she may go home from the hospital in a couple of days, if not
tomorrow. Her kidney function is improving steadily. Ideally they want
it at 0.7 and she has a whole point at least to go. While the blood
sugar is still a bit high, it will get better once the diarrhea from
the C. diff is under control and she can eat real food ad monitor it.
That is improving as well.
They were able to put another IV line in again today. Not sure how
long it will last. All the veins in her arms have been unusable with
the IV's after a couple of days. She has some really ugly black and
blue marks.
She has to go back in 6 weeks to so they can see if the blocked gall
bladder is unblocked or they can get the stone out. They are giving
her bile salts to try and "melt" the small stone and help loosen the
large one that blocked the duct. They put the stint in and it appears
to be working to drain the gall bladder and liver. This is important.
I don't know yet if she wants to go to her house or mine until she
gets well. I'm concerned about it but she has to make the decision.
Aunt Phillis will stay over a few days to act as nurse while I am at
work. I don't know how we would have managed without her and uncle
Dale this week. I simply could not be everywhere and I couldn't take
off work. I certainly couldn't have stayed at the hospital ever
minute. We've managed to be there around the clock for the first three
days. Last night we all came back to the house for the first time
since last Wednesday.
Thank you to everyone who called, prayed, and came by to visit. I know
she appreciated it. To my blog friends, once again you have proven the
best friends.
Monday
Actually, it started as a gloomy, cooler morning. The sun is not
burning off the clouds and temps are expected to get back up in the
90's. That is where they were yesterday morning when I got to the
hospital. When I left they were in the low 70's. Today is a reverse.
I'm tired. I went to bed at 7:30. Woke up to at 9 p.m. and had to eat
a sandwich, which I didn't want but needed. Went back to bed. I woke
at 6:30 this morning. I had to get up during the night for an ice pack
for my lower back and leg. I took generic Tylenol but it didn't do
much for several hours. I had problems most of the night and it is
probably why I'm tired today.
Not sure of Phyllis' status. She called around 11 and woke me to tell
me that her two iv lines had failed . . . again. They couldn't get
blood. They have had to move up her arms every day with a new iv
because the veins keep failing. They say it is the sodium chloride
that causes it. They were concerned her potassium would drop because
she isn't getting it and still has diarrhea. Until that stops she's
losing fluids. It isn't as bad but it is still happening. I talked to
them a few minutes ago and they haven't seen the doctor yet. So now
idea still on what is happening.
I calculated that I can't miss any work for the next 5 months to earn
a week and a half of vacation. It is depressing. I wish I'd not taken
my vacation when my plans fell through but I really needed that time
off. And I was frustrated I couldn't do what I wanted to do. I was
sick for half of it anyway so it was a waste all the way around. The
only good news is that Sept. 5, Nov 8, 24, 24 & Dec 23, 26 and 30 are
all holidays coming up so it isn't as if I won't get any days off. I
just can't be sick or take a vacation day if I want to have any come
spring!
I'm off now. I have to wade through the piles here. Stay cool.
Sunday, July 24, 2011
Update for Sunday Night
They stint appears to be working and her levels are returning to normal. The kidney is now at 2.7 and her blood sugar is down to 132. All great improvements. She is taking insulin shots and I don't know if that will continue but probably until she is able to get on a more stable diet.
I'm headed for a hot shower and bed, I think. Tomorrow, I return to work.
Saturday, July 23, 2011
Long Day
The procedure was unsuccessful at removing the gall stone. They had to put a stint in to allow the gall bladder and liver to drain. They had to make a small incision and put the stint next to the stone. They will give her bile salts to try and dissolve the other smaller stones they said are in the bladder and they hope the stint will rub against the large blocking stone and that with the salt could break it down enough to pass it. She has to have the procedure done again in six weeks!
We were all simply stunned and so upset. And when she came around she ask me and I had to tell her no. She cried and said she was tired and wanted it over. She is so scared and there are so many things all at once happening to her. And the cost is weighing heavily on her mind.
Her blood sugar is hovering around 165 + or -. And her kidney's were at 4.7 on Wednesday night but are now at 3.7. A small but good drop. But they must be better before they can treat anything else.
They say in six weeks she has to have the same procedure done again. She also has c diff and they've started treatment for that but we've all been exposed and if we show symptoms we all have to be treated.
So... that is the current state of affairs. It's been a long day. I'm tired. Good night.
Start of a Day
I don't know when they will do the procedure. I'm very concerned. I gather pancretitus is serious and painful. There is no one here to help me once they go home and I don't think she'd be able to work. I can only hope that the procedure to remove the stones is not a problem.
This is not to remove the gall bladder at this point. They can't remove that with stones in the duct. They have to get the stones out and then go back again and remove the gall bladder.
They are also going to test her for something called cetif or cediff. Not sure of the spelling. Causes diarrhea and other intestinal issues and is brought on by excessive use of antibiotics. Around the first of the year she has at least 4 rounds of them for a sinus infection and I told her then that was very bad for her. When she got sick this last week they gave her another round of antibiotics. I think that was the trigger to all of this. It is highly contagious, particularly to children. So we have to stay away from Sarah. I don't know how they treat that but we'll see if she has it first. I take a pro-biotic, acidophiles, every day so am not too worried. It is the bad bacteria in your stomach on steroids so to speak that causes the problem. Antibiotics kill the good bacteria and cause the bad to fluoresce. You're body is over run with it.
And I'm told can cause kidney problems, liver problems, etc
I've not looked any of this stuff up because, frankly, I've got enough worry on my plate in my own head and don't need to feed it. I'm sure it is all very bad.
So, gone for now. Just have to put on my top and shoes and gather my crochet, a book and anything else to get me through hours idleness.
Friday, July 22, 2011
Drama - Who Needs Television
My sister, Phyllis, had a procedure today to determine if there are any blockages of the ducts of her gall bladder. If there are, they must be removed. This is a painful and serious problem. The procedure revealed that there is a blockage. Tomorrow the same procedure will be done to remove the blockage. They use a different instrument next time. There is a risk with this step - it can cause pancreatitus if a stone gets in the pancreas or if they nick it with the instrument - so they don't like to use this instrument unless they are sure there is a blockage, ergo, same procedure done twice.
When she went to the ER on Wednesday night her blood sugar was 500 and she was in renal failure. Her liver enzymes were high, indicating a blockage from her gall bladder. Had she gone home instead of the ER she would have died.Yesterday, they had problems getting a vein to draw blood, finally having to disconnect her IV and draw blood from that needle. Her sugar fluctuated between 165 and 200 most of the day. Her liver enzymes were falling indicating that there was no blockage. But they had to see if there are any stones in the tube that drains the gall bladder. If there are, they must be removed before they removed the gall bladder. If a stone happens to get into the pancreas she can get pancreatitus. If it blocks the tubes, it also blocks liver ducts and her kidneys can fail. When there are no stones blocking the ducts, they can remove the gall bladder.
I'm told that Phyllis talked to her job today and they said her job was not in jeopardy and they were putting her on medical leave. They were very nice. I suspect that they listened to my recorded phone call from Wednesday night where I explained loudly what I thought, what I was going to do and how very much it was going to cost them before I was done. Maybe they didn't but I have the note from the check stub about her having no more time. The gist of my message was that win or lose by the time I was done it was going to cost far more than a small company might be willing to pay. My message was that Phyllis and I both wanted to retire... NOW. Of course, maybe they didn't get that message.
I'm exhausted. Pain levels were up this morning everywhere but oddly, my feet are bother me less than anything else. Maybe not so oddly. My lower back and right leg were pretty bad last night. I took acetaminophen and nearly got an ice pack but I was so tired I did not want to get up and I went to sleep. That was a bit better this morning. All this garbage I take can kill you but acetaminophen works better on that back pain than anything. Weird.
Our youngest sister was having a fit because she wanted to tell our mother about Phyllis. Phyllis did not want this. If you knew our mother, the drama queen, you wouldn't question this. It is all about HER. Bill called me yesterday and said he'd talked to her and she was saying, "I'm sicker than I've ever been in my life." Whereupon she began to relate all her ills. This is her tag line. I intend to have it carved on her headstone. Unless I tattoo it on her forehead first!
Anyway, Roselynn was having a fit because "she has to live with this woman". She doesn't really live with her but she lives a good 15 miles away and feels responsible for her for some reason. I personally don't care what they tell her or if they tell her. This is the woman who would not answer her phone when Phyllis called her for years! Why she'd care is beyond me but since she says she does they can tell her anything they want. My aunt was talking to Rose and I told her to tell her that but that under no circumstances was mother dearest to call that hospital and give Phyllis any whining, moaning, and poor little me garbage. Honestly, she'd try the patience of God. I ain't.
I've had a very bad week. In fact, my life has been pretty rotten for several years now. In the last couple of weeks I've chewed out more people than usualt. I'm getting tired of being a sweet magnolia, I guess. If things don't shape up, Dixie's gonna rise again. It won't be any prettier the second time.
I will update as time and energy permits.
Monday, July 18, 2011
Monday Morning Rush
I went to church last night and we had Brother Ashcraft visiting. He is a very good minister. I don't know if you all know about ministers who have a "Word of Knowledge" or not but he does and he also prays for healing for people. After the preaching he usually ministers to individuals with this. He came over to me just as he stopped and said he was going to pray for the pain in my feet! I did have pain in my feet, I always do. And I was hurting in a lot of other places. But my feet stopped hurting! And they aren't really hurting today. In fact, my knees stopped hurting. In 15 minutes I was not hurting anywhere and I went home and had an excellent night's sleep with NO PAIN! Excuse me while I dance a minute. Cause I could today.
For those who don't know me, pain is a serious problem for me. I sleep badly and have virtually no periods of no pain at all. For the doubters, no, I had not talked with him. I don't actually "know" him. He's been to the church a few times. The last time he was here he prayed for the pain in my neck at my request but even then, we didn't talk. The neck has been much better ever since. Last night he arrived after service started and went straight to the front. My feel feel fine today and that alone is unusual.
I had a really lovely Saturday. I got to spend it with my daughter-in-law and Sarah. I actually like spending time with Becca but for a while now we've not been able to do that. They haven't been coming over as much either. Their car was in bad shape and they didn't want to get out. But I think we had a nice day. I did. I bought shoes for Sarah. I do that to help and because I love buying shoes! The only shopping I actually like is shoe shopping. But Sarah was exhausted by noon and in a really bad mood. We'd been to several places but her foot is difficult to fit so it was necessary. And one store had a shoe to fit her but not the one we wanted. The other store had the one we wanted but not her size!
We went to JoAnn fabrics and bought ribbon and clips for Becca to make hair bows. They are quite expensive to buy. And the initial start up to make them is high but no higher than 5 of those bows! I told her she better make them if I buy all that ribbon! If she doesn't I repo it and do it myself.
David got off as 6 and we all went to supper. Mike had company and we didn't see him.
Poor Mike, his company was another bimbo who stole some brand new games from him. He's upset. He won't listen to me about these people he keeps meeting on the internet. No reflection to my friends here but if a woman is advertising on the internet there is a REASON. It isn't because men are beating a path to her door. It is because they aren't. And this one weighed at least 350 lbs and was a thief! A woman that big should never wear jeans (where she got them that large is beyond me). I could have used them for a sail! This isn't the first one to cost him. Hello? There is a clue here.
He's upset but I think he was hurt more because she emailed him and said some very hurtful things. Mind you she stuck around for 5 days. My guess is she was looking for things worth stealing and he got the games Saturday. He doesn't really have anything else. She took them to a store in a different town and got a refund on them.
I'm going to stop now. I worked on my sewing video last night. I still have the second part to edit and then, the third part to make. I actually like this one but see where I need to improve my skills. LOL, not that they are going anywhere. It is fun though.
I have to start writing something soon. The writing group meets again in a week.
I"m off to take a break now. Hope you all have a good Monday.
I
Saturday, July 16, 2011
Saturday - What do I do?
I'm on my way out to do some errands for my sister, pick up Sarah and Becca and go buy shoes for Sarah, and paint to finish the porch and the shed. Becca's dad painted the porch yesterday while Sue cleaned the house.
I am so relieved by Sue's efforts. I am not really too messy, actually but I have so many weekends where I'm having mobility issues that it builds up. Today I do one room. Next week I part of another or a the whole room, then another until weeks later I'm back at the original room and it is a disaster. In the mean time dust accumulates and cobwebs. I get frustrated by all of it. I used to clean my whole house on Saturday. Now, I'm lucky if I get one room done.
So, today, I'll have the running to do and then, work on my skirt tutorial. If the insurance crisis had not hit me I would have had a perfect day, as perfect as this back will allow. It is acting up this morning. I've managed to read the blogs and comment on a few. I'm on my way out now. So everyone enjoy your day! I'll return with stories.
Friday, July 15, 2011
Do I Have Stupid Tattooed on My Forehead?
Thursday, July 14, 2011
Great Writers' Meeting
I had a so-so day at work. There were only two case managers, admissions person, inspection clerk and receptionist working today out of a staff of 13. The two inspectors worked but they are never in the office anyway. By 4 two of those in house had left as well. I was the only case manager in the office and I had to cover for the front desk today. I got NONE of my own work done. Never mind...
My back has been ok. I am being careful what I do and how long I sit at one job. I can tell it isn't quite right but so far it isn't as bad as it was last weekend.
Tomorrow is Friday. The day only last 8 hours. If I can sit at my desk and do my job it will go quickly. I spent three hours doing front desk duty today. I can't do that tomorrow if I expect to get done.
Tomorrow night I want to finish up my skirt tutorial and get that edited so I can post it by Sunday at least. {I cuda been a stah!} Ok I think it is time for bed.
Tuesday, July 12, 2011
Stormy Weather
Monday, July 11, 2011
A Lunch Break
My pain is a bit better today, all but my upper back. The muscles in that part of my back are just screaming. I think I am going to have to stop sitting on the sofa to do any computer work. And I must find a better seat for sewing. I'm a bit low on my current chair I think. All of which I believe has lead to strained back muscles.
I was looking at Jilly's blog and she is just whizzing along with all these crafts. She is really catching on to the sewing, too. Of course, I've always told people it is very easy to learn, not quick, mind you, but easy to learn. Once you get the basics, you've got it licked. I miss not having the time to do all the things I want to do. But I'm truly glad I bought that new machine. I have so enjoyed using it and just sewing again gives me a lot of pleasure. My Sarah will be the best dressed kid in day care! LOL, Becca always dresses her nicely and fixes her hair. People say they always look forward to seeing what she'll have on next. She is a bit like dressing a doll. An 18 inch waist!
I've bee posting my videos to You-Tube this week. It is so much easier than multiply and way faster! And I can use them on the other blogs instead of having to load them up more than once. Just have to keep them below 15 minutes.
It is currently 97F here. When I got in my car it said it was 102F! I guess it was reading the internal temp of the car. Of course, it could be 102F. At these temperature ranges, there is very little difference.
Ok, time to get ready to head back. Just wanted to stop in while I had a chance. Not sure what I'll be doing tonight.
Sunday, July 10, 2011
Sunday Dash
Saturday, July 9, 2011
Another Saturday Whirl
I still ached pretty much everywhere and there wasn't a dark cloud in sight. Still weather changes seem to follow such pain so I'll be watching. I put off going after Mike until nearly noon despite his calling wanting me to take him to the grocery store.
Instead I sat down and worked on another skort for Sarah. I did the shorts and stopped long enough to go get Mike, take a trip to Lowe's for Round-up and while there found a simply smashing curtain rod for $2! And it had these matching "tie" back things you attach to the wall to tie back the curtain, also $2. It had "Kids" on it meaning it was for a child's room but it is silver with pink and blue "gems" on the finials. Really pretty and not so much kid looking as feminine. They had two but I only have one room with one window in mind and that is the guest room with the new curtains. Next for that room I'll have to buy paint and put in carpet. It is going to be a nice little room when I'm done.
Must get the excess furniture out first!
While we were out we had lunch at Penn Station. Then I had to get my mower out from repair. We got back to the house around 3 and Mike set about cutting the yard. He worked about 15 minutes and took a break of about 20! He worked 15 minutes and took another break of about 20. It took him 4 hours to cut this yard. Yes, it was hot. Yes, it is a big yard. But I've done it in hotter weather and half the the time. The key is lots of water and limited breaks. I was so frustrated with him for taking so long. I told him I was NOT going to the grocery store at 7 p.m. He could wait for another day.
While he cut the yard I worked on Sarah's skort. I got the skirt nearly done and realized that this was a really pretty skirt! So, skort idea out the window. She can use the shorts for something else. I don't like making them anyway. They're rather boring and I spent years making shorts and pants for boys. I have only to put elastic in the skirt and the short waistbands and I'm done with them. Yes, there will be photos. I'm posting them here but the videos will be in my sewing blog on blogger after I put them on Youtube.
I managed to hound Mike until he got his bath and I took him home. I came back, by way of CVS Pharmacy to pick up meds, and scrambled some eggs. I do scrambled eggs exceptionally well, light, fluffy, and not hard. I had that, two pieces of toast with a light spread of Strawberry jam, and a glass of the coldest milk I can remember, just the way I like it. Saturday turned upside down!
Now, I've had my shower and am about to embark on on my vessel to the land of Nod where I shall lie blissfully in the arms of Morpheus. Well, after I've rolled my hair and brushed my teeth.
Friday, July 8, 2011
Friday Roundup
I haven't sewn all week. I've been getting to bed by 11:00 most nights and I've had less pain. Not sure if it is the sleep o the weather, which has been rotten for 24 hours. No idea about tomorrow.
I have some things I'd like to do but already Mike has called for me to come get him. I'm tired of doing this Saturday dance every single weekend. I told him it would be late tomorrow before I can pick him up. Again, he needs groceries but I just want a weekend to rest.
Sarah asked if she come back over tomorrow afternoon. I told her yes. She was here a bit tonight so Dave and Becca could go somewhere together. They don't get to do that a whole lot unless I keep Sarah. She was good as gold but a real handful to boot. She talked non-stop.
I don't know where she gets it from. And I had a house full of superheros. Batman, Superman, Ironman, Spiderman, and a fella called Sonic. According to Sarah, they were our Guess. I told her that was find but they better behave themselves. No climbing the walls, which the promptly did. They were quite but then, I doubt they could get a word in edgewise with Sarah around.
I've trying to put my second fabric video on my sewing blog but something has happened since I did the first one and it won't load. I'm uploading it to YouTube to see if I can do it then. I think I can but not sure.
The house is relatively clean but I've ask Sue to come clean for me next Friday. She moved back and she is just the best cleaner. So, I'm not going to kill myself cleaning this weekend. I'm going to do what I want to do and just keep it tidy. She'll do a thorough cleaning on the 15th. She likes it, needs the money and I need the help. My house will smell so good when she is done!
I got a call today and my mower is ready to pick up. So, I think that will be a project for Mike to help me with tomorrow. Good thing since Phyllis' mower has a wheel broken. I'm also going to buy some more Roundup to kill the rest of that mess in my fence. I've got some more gift card money for Lowe's and I have several items I need.
I've done NO writing. It just isn't happening. I don't know why. I'm depressed about it. I just don't do it and find ways to avoid it. No, I'm angry about it. I don't know if I care anymore. I'm going to pour myself in the the sewing and get all that fabric out of here.
Oh, get this, I mentioned my new machine at work and a woman there said, "OH, I have some things I need altered. I'll bring them to you! Do you do alterations?" I said that I had not done alterations. I told her altering a garment you had not made was different from making a garment. It was harder.She waved a hand and said, "Well, if you can make a something you can alter it. I'll bring something that won't matter if you mess it up."
I kid you not. She never asked me if I wanted to do them. I wish I could give you a number as to how many times I've had this happen. This is the second person at work to do this. They don't even ask! They just tell me, as if I have all this time to do their sewing!
O.k. I'm headed to bed. I've vented enough. It is now way past my allotted bed time.
Tuesday, July 5, 2011
Full Story of Youcef Nadarkhani | Present Truth Ministries
Saturday, July 2, 2011
Another Saturday Awry
I picked up Mike to bring him over to cut the yard. However, this is not a job that he can/will do to my satisfaction without constant nagging. Go back and cut that corner. Pick up the paper before you cut. Move the brick to cut, don't go around it. Go back and cut that corner. Go back and cut that corner! NOW!
I sprayed Round-Up around the areas I'm tired of bastard plants sprouting up. They will die a slow, well deserved death. Two hours after I was done I saw that those in the direct sunlight were already turning black. By the way, I think we finally killed the tree that is under the air conditioner duct work at the foundation of the house. We'll see.
Around noon we had to go get my sister's car. I took her some lunch since she asked me to. You remember that mower I bought in 2009 and have had in the shop every summer since. Yes, that one. I put it in the shop again. Since 2009 I've probably had my yard cut with it about a dozen times. I will never buy another Craftsman lawnmower from Sears.
Anyway, we've been using a small, cheap Weedeater brand that belonged to my sister until she sold her house. Today, the back wheel broke on that on but we soldiered on. No choice.
I went to get Sarah around 3 and Becca over.
Eventually... several hours later... say around 4, Mike and I were done. The yard was cut, the overgrown areas cut and four bags of yard waste on the street. Sarah helped bag the yard waste. Mike finished the corners. We were exhausted. I cut Mike's hair and he got a hot shower and shaved.
I had to pick up Dave at 5. He picked up Becca's dad to come help fix his brakes. They were gone by 7. Me, Mike and Sarah went for burgers and ice cream and I dropped a very worn out Mike home.
At 8 I finally got a hot shower and Sarah just got a bath at 8:30. I am hoping she will be ready for bed very soon.
I did no sewing, no writing, and no relaxing. I'm tired.
I'm also tied of having every weekend spent working or dealing with everyone's disasters, even my own.
Texan Wins Controversial 'White Man' Scholarship - FoxNews.com
I found this highly amusing for a couple of reasons. For years there was an advertisement on television for the National Negro College Fund. Wonderful program I am sure but it offends me because of the hypocrisy. When we saw this commercial my husband and I would wonder what would happen if someone started A National White College Fund to assist whites only. We speculated that it would be called racist and be attacked by the left wing.
I wish Jerry was here so we could say "We were right!" and have a laugh over it. If I had money to spare, I'd actually donate to this scholarship fund! Seriously! I'd be called a racist simply for that reason alone. "Oh, yes, I donate to the "White Man Scholarship Fund". I can even see people being fired for it!
We live in a world where racism is a matter of perspective. You remember the guy who recently said I treated the white clients with more attention that I did him? I told a friend this week that if it became necessary I have two black female clients who have sent me cards stating I was the best case worker they've ever had.
The difference in all of those cases is in what the person wanted to see or hear. I treated them all the same but one wanted to get special treatment while the others wanted fair treatment. Two said thank you while the other stomped his feet and waved a race card.
"Kirk to Enterprise. There's no intelligent life here. Beam me up, Scotty!"
Friday, July 1, 2011
Thursday, June 30, 2011
Nearly There.........
So, every year they spend a lot of money getting a clubhouse at a local park where the is swimming... with lots of other people I do not know. Last year I took a deck of cards and Carolyn and I played Uno. A few others drifted over and joined us. Carolyn shares my feelings about these things.
I guess we are just no friendly. But maybe that isn't true. Our senior aide will be leaving tomorrow. She told us today that she could always count on a laugh coming from either Carolyn's office or mine. That is nice. She called us Mutt & Jeff. I laughed and told her I'd not heard that in many years. Mutt & Jeff was a comic strip in the "funnies" for a long time. Two guys, one very tall and the other very short. Carolyn is tall and I'm average. But I guess we are funny. Other staff do laugh at us a lot. Still, for someone who's only known us a year to say that is flattering.
Anyway, I'll probably, I hope, be able to slip away around 3 p.m.
Tonight was the writer's meeting. We have four there. Two others were away. I've written up the meeting on the The Writers' Asylum blog for those who are interested.
I'm headed for bed very soon. I got a relatively good sleep last night but woke at 6 a.m. That is an ungodly hour but I have to get up early tomorrow. Dave's brakes went out on his car. He has to have a way to work. So, he'll take me, got himself and I'll pick up my car before I leave for the picnic or after I get back. He works 9-6 and I work 8-5 So it is a juggling act.
I'm headed for bed and the weekend. A 3-day weekend! Yipee.
Wednesday, June 29, 2011
A Nice Break
Vernon, IN. That is only 30 minutes from here and we arranged to meet
for lunch. It was nice to see him, even for a short time. I don't get
to see him as much as I'd like because the distance and because he is
always on the road. He drives a big truck.
I came back to the office and tried to get some paperwork done. I've
not had a good couple of days. In fact, the week has not been very
good. Part of it is things at work but I know part of it is me.I have
just been down and last night I simply sat and watched t.v. shows on
Hulu. I picked Sarah up from daycare after work and dropped her off
and went to Joann fabrics to get some trims for her skirts, then I
went home. My original intent was to cut skirts out but I just found I
had no desire to do anything.
I don't have the terrible bouts of crying anymore. But in some ways I
wish I did. Now it is this awful empty feeling where you want to cry
but can't. I had such a rough couple of days at work. I remembered
several years ago under my old boss how things got terrible and I'd go
home to rant and get it off my chest. Jerry would sit and listen and
ask questions or offer sympathy. Sometimes I'd get annoyed at the
questions. Now, my stress pours into the air surrounding me and
darkens it. Coming home on Tuesday I was overwhelmed with the
realization that I'd only added to Jerry's misery with my gripes. He
couldn't fix it for me, hated that I had to work, hated not to be able
to take care of me. It must have been horrendous to sit and listen to
me and be totally helpless. It had to have simply cut him to the bone.
Tonight I'm very tired and on my way to bed. I've had a long day and
I've found that it is one of those days when I seem very confused,
unable to focus, and even my speech seemed affected during the move
briefing. I couldn't get the words to come out right. I felt very
stupid but I knew it was because I just was not all there.
Anyway, I'm off for now. Tomorrow night it the writers' meeting.
Lately I've been tired and not really able to focus on the meetings as
well as I would like so I hope tomorrow I'll find myself less tired.
Monday, June 27, 2011
End of a Busy Monday
I had lunch after this and went in to work at 1 p.m. and was so busy dealing with computer problems and records that I needed to process. One client called my boss and said I'd treated him differently than I had the white people.... that I had not given him as much time as I did the white folks.
Half my co-workers are black, as is my boss. You'd think my racism would have surfaced after 13 years. My boss told the guy that he worked well with me but he'd pass along his concerns. He did in an email to me. My opinion was that he thought he'd get special treatment if he used the race card. I told my boss that because the man had made the complaint I'd no longer discuss anything with him alone and all phone calls would be witnessed and he'd have to appoint the person to be the witness since I didn't want the man saying I'd chosen a white person over a black. I then made a call to the man with a black co-worker present and told him that all further contact would be witnessed. He never even acknowledged that he's made the complaint!
I had to call his landlord who is another black co-worker and told her about the problem I was having and to give her details she needed on his file. She laughed and said, "I guess I must be white!" She is a big girl and every time she sees me she hugs me.
There is a saying in the department. "Don't tic off the case manager." Every one I know tries very hard to assist clients with problems but when you get a client who lies on you just to get special treatment, you just lost your advocate. We do not attempt to get even. We don't have to. We all know that at some point that particular client is going to be in trouble with their housing. We'll be waiting.
When the day ended in a flurry, I came home to spend the evening with Dave, Becca, and Sarah. It was nice. They had not been over in awhile and I enjoyed it. I ironed the fabric for the next round of sewing.
Now, it is time for beddie-bye. I'm tired and my back is not happy for being here. Hope you all are doing well. I have posted the link to my sewing blog. I have, at this point, only posted what is currently posted here so it won't be new stuff. But I'm looking forward to putting up some other things as I do them. I just counted and with the multiply blog, I have 9 blogs but only about 4 are open and active. Still, it is a lot. I wonder if this means I'm published?
Sunday, June 26, 2011
Sarah Said...
Raging Rain, Raging Pain
Thursday, June 23, 2011
You Can Look It Up
Please take note of WHO is making all the decisions about WHO gets health care. No, I don't know if it is true. You can look it up but I find it highly enlightening.
Obama Care Highlighted by Page Number
THE CARE BILL HB 3200
JUDGE KITHIL IS THE 2ND OFFICIAL WHO HAS OUTLINED THESE PARTS OF THE CARE BILL. Judge Kithil of Marble Falls, TX - highlighted the most egregious pages of HB3200. Please read this........ especially the reference to pages 58 & 59
JUDGE KITHIL wrote:
** Page 50/section 152: The bill will provide insurance to all non-U.S. residents, even if they
are here illegally.
** Page 58 and 59: The government will have real-time access to an individual's bank account
and will have the authority to make electronic fund transfers from those accounts.
** Page 65/section 164: The plan will be subsidized (by the government) for all union members, union retirees and for community organizations (such as the Association of CommunityOrganizations for Reform Now - ACORN).
** Page 203/line 14-15: The tax imposed under this section will not be treated as a tax.
(How could anybody in their right mind come up with that?)
** Page 241 and 253: Doctors will all be paid the same regardless of specialty, and the
government will set all doctors' fees.
** Page 272. section 1145: Cancer hospital will ration care according to the patient's age.
** Page 317 and 321: The government will impose a prohibition on hospital expansion; however, communities may petition for an exception.
** Page 425, line 4-12: The government mandates advance-care planning consultations.
Those on Social Security will be required to attend an "end-of-life planning" seminar every
five years. (Death counseling..)
** Page 429, line 13-25: The government will specify which doctors can write an end-of-life order.
HAD ENOUGH???? Judge Kithil then goes on to identify: "Finally, it is specifically stated that this bill will not apply to members of Congress. Members of Congress are already exempt from the Social Security system, and have a well-funded private plan that covers their retirement needs. If they were on our Social Security plan, I believe they would find a very quick 'fix' to make the plan financially sound for their future."
(Such bills are available for review at the congressional websites. On a lighter note, it is nce to know that nursing homes will be a thing of the past.")
Monday, June 20, 2011
My Bed is Calling
Anyway, I hope to finish them up tomorrow night. Then, it will be another round of cutting out I hope by the weekend. I will cut out as much as I can and leave it in a nice neat stack ready to sit and sew together. One day of cutting usually can result in a month of items to sew.
I've discovered I must get a very good chair. I'm using a lawn chair... not the folding kind. The plastic kind that actually look like chairs and they sit pretty good, too. But not for sewing or computer work. Once I get the study emptied and ready to sand, I'll bring the desk chair in here.
There is so much to do and I have so little functional time to do it in. And sometimes recovering from what I do takes longer than the project takes. That sanding job is no fun. And cleaning it up, well, that is a terrible mess. If I don't do it correctly, it will be all over the house.
Ok, I've put it off enough. I have to go to bed. It is now scream at me and it is quite difficult to ignore.
Saturday, June 18, 2011
What A Difference Chocolate Makes!
What I think is that my blood sugar is not regulated. The fact that a chocolate bar made me feel better is not a good sign. But it was a good chocolate bar!
I've been rearranging things getting read to work on the study. The spare room is crowded but not useless. Today Mike and I moved bookcases and printers. I went and bought new glasses. They had a 2 for 1 deal so I have a backup pair.
I like the blue pair a lot. Makes my green eyes turn blue! Happen when I wear blue clothes, too.
The other pair a a tortoise shell color and I like them as well but for some reason they are not as comfortable as they were in the store. Still, it is the first time I've had a back up pair of glasses. I have an old pair I'm going to have turned into work glasses. Be nice to have that!
I am in a writing and sewing mood. I'll have videos later relating to the sewing mood. The Writer's Asylum meeting on Thursday night and Doug's challenge seems to have spurred us all a bit. If I can keep this clarity my writing will be back on track.
It has rained most of the day and it was really a lovely cool morning. The afternoon it cleared and warmed up but it is now cloudy again as night approaches.
I'm almost in awe at how much better I feel today. I woke with pain in the joints of my hands and my neck is bugging me a bit but other than that, I'm pretty good. I am running out of steam a bit. It is just now 7 p.m. and I'm going to get a hot shower and take my medicine and see where the moment takes me.
I have some video surprise coming up on the Multiply site. I say this because my blog is cross posted to a couple of other platforms.
I'm headed off to fix something to eat. Fried chicken from Buy-Low and field peas from the freezer. I love, love, love field peas!
Thursday, June 16, 2011
Asylum Meeting
The meeting went well and I've posted all about it on the Asylum blog. I'm too tired to reiterate. Feel free to visit the Asylum and read all about it.
Actually some interesting stuff there now. I'm impressed.
Doesn't take much.
Tuesday, June 14, 2011
Slow Row Up River
I did have a bit of a melt down last night. I'm still tired today because I sat up too late. I must go to bed earlier tonight. I say this frequently. I feel like sleeping is such a waste of valuable time. I've always felt this but as I have aged, my body tends to disagree with me, in various ways, and to punish me if I ignore the demands. So, I have to sleep more. Besides, when I don't get enough, I get even less done.
I've had hiccups off and on all day and it is quite annoying.
I've been listening to a set of cds Becca gave me by a fella called Lou Tice of the Pacific Institute. Motivational speaker. He has some good ideas. Not new but good. He's on YouTube. As a result of listening to these cds I started to do a couple of the things he suggest. One is positive affirmations. I've practiced this in the past with surprising results. Before you go to sleep every night, say these positive affirmations to yourself. For example, tomorrow will be a good day, I will accomplish .... (you add what you want here). As I said, I've done this in the past. Can't hurt. Actually, I've had several rather calm days and I think it is because of that. So, I'll keep trying it.
Monday, June 13, 2011
Nervous Minister
A member of the flock raised his hand and said, "That's not much of a trick. I could do that."
The minister didn't respond. However, the next Sunday he decided to repeat the text. This time he did it properly: "And they fed five thousand men with five loaves of bread and two fishes."
Smiling, the minister said to the noisy man, "Could you do that, Mr. Perkins?"
The member of the flock said, "I sure could."
"How would you do it?"
"With all the food I had left over from last Sunday!"
Sunday, June 12, 2011
Six of One, Half Dozen of the Other
I had fun reading this but at the end I had to laugh. America has Hollywood. England has the Royals.
Tuesday, June 7, 2011
Setting Sail
I had a bad time with this vacation. The first five days I could not get myself directed. I sat in this house and became more and more depressed until finally I had to get out. I went to the fabric store and bought patterns, fabric, and thread. I came home and managed to get two days of sewing before I practically collapsed with this cold. From Friday until Tuesday, I was more or less immobile. I couldn't breath. I sneezed and my nose ran. I wiped it so much it became raw. And my emotions became as raw as my nose. I cried for no reason and for every reason for days and nights.
I want to say I can't remember feeling so dark in spirit but that wouldn't be true. The last two and half years have been filled with days of such darkness that I don't want to remember. Keeping the blog has been a good thing in this respect. I have been able to go back in time in a way I would not have been able to had I not written it down. I don't go back often. There are some experiences you simply do not want to relive. But now and then, for some reason I find myself looking at entries from those darkest days. These last days have been very dark. I almost looked forward to going back to work.
The analogy has been with me for some time now of drifting on a huge ocean. In one post I mention islands of happiness in a sea of misery. It still holds true, at least for me.
Wednesday morning I was reading the daily devotional that is always near my chair but which I forget at times. I can't remember what I read at the moment but I remember the feeling that nothing makes sense to me anymore. I feel as if I'm adrift on a great sea and I have no idea which direction to steer. My ship, Life, seems to have come to a halt and the sails I set hang limply from the mast. The sea is glass. And as far as I can see, there is no land.
When you are drifting in the doldrums you have little to do except twiddle your thumbs. Blowing the sails will do you no good and only make you dizzy. You need a stiff breeze fill them up and push your bark forward. So, one searches for help in strange places. I went back to study the charts. In this case, my blogs.
Despite what you may think, I still believe that God is always in control. When the storm blows me off track, it is because there is some place I needed to go and my sails were set in another direction. We're creatures of habit and stubborn. Sometimes the only way we'll change our course is to be blown out of it. I believe I've been blown way off course. I've been struggling to chart a new one.
When one is far at sea there are no landmarks, no light houses. The ocean is a shifting landscape of waves and whitecaps, clouds and sky. When far from land, ancient mariners plotted by the stars. There were times, though, when there was no star to steer by, when the heavens were cloaked in darkness and the winds died and the ship was becalmed. And yet, even during the darkest of nights, when clouds hung heavy and there was no wind, the seamen knew that beyond the darkness, somewhere above, the North Star still hung steadfast in the heavens. They had only to wait for the return of the winds to sweep the heavens clear, look up, get their bearings, and sail on.
Monday, June 6, 2011
Stars and garters
Indiana Police Search for Missing College Student Lauren Spierer - FoxNews.com
I do not know what is wrong with this world. Well, I do, but I can't fix it. Pray for them to find this girl. There is also one in N. Carolina that is missing, a nursing student. Went to get something from her car while working and never came back. These are not girls practicing risky behavior. They are, according to everyone, hardworking college students described as very good students, smart and pretty, well liked by everyone.
I honestly do not know what kind of mind it takes to do these things. Subhumans. Animals, and that's an insult to animals.
Sorry if that sounds harsh and uncharitable but these creatures are a blight on society and a disgrace to the human race.