The 2024 Roller Coaster Ride Now Open

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Here we are, four days into the new year. I had a lovely Christmas holiday with my sons, Mike and David, my granddaughter Sarah, Mike's girlfriend, Amanda. And I even got some lovely gifts from everyone. We had a delicious dinner, cooked mostly by Amanda, with a bit of help from me. 

New Year's Day we watch the Alabama playoff game. They lost, but they played a good game, except for the guy snapping the ball. McLaughlin was definitely not on his game. All season, he snapped the ball just fine. Suddenly he's all thumbs.

The past four days have just been hectic with trying to get things organized for more people in the house. On the 15th Amanda is moving in for a while. She's wanting to buy, so to avoid getting into a new lease, she'll stay here until she finds what she wants. David is here for a bit, not sure how long, but it is really pleasant to spend some time with him. He's working on his last five college classes. I'm very proud of the way he's pushed to do this. He really messed up highschool but went back in his 30s and now he's nearly finished with his college bachelor's degree. 

Sarah and I are just enjoying being silly with each other. She's still the funniest kid I know. Of course, she's having a bit of a struggle to get back into my routines and rules, but she's coping rather well. We're going to get her state ID this week and then get started on her GED. She didn't want to go back to public school and as a graduate of a correspondent school; I agree it is a good idea. So we'll be tutoring and getting to GED classes.

I'm trying to get my routine back on track. When disruptions happen, it just throws me off for a while. Beginning in early to mid October, I was sick for a couple of months, had my car break down twice, had electrical repairs, an empty freezer, and other unforeseen expenses from October to December. Life keeps kicking me. 

BUT ---

I am blessed. I said, I AM BLESSED! I don't care what my brain says. I don't care what the devil says. I am blessed beyond measure. I'm broke, seriously broke, but I'm blessed. 

May you all have a wonderful New Year. I know the 1st is passed, but may the rest of 2024 be filled with gladness, joy, and spiritual blessing beyond your wildest imaginings. God is good. God reigns supreme. And he is faithful.

 

A Month of Stuff

It has been a busy and rough couple of weeks. I finished NaNoWriMo four days early. In the past I've finished as early as a couple of days but not four days. It was a nice feeling, in addition to getting the 50k goal. I couldn't have done it, I suspect, without the online write-ins we had over on Mibbit.

We had to move Mike over the course of two Sundays. The only common day off we share is Sunday so it had to be done. One guy showed up to help him on the Sunday before the holiday weekend. They moved everything into my garage. We left the boxes and small items in the old unit until Thanksgiving weekend. Then, they let him start putting things in the unit on Wednesday. It was very good of them and saved us a bundle in truck rental and time.

Thanksgiving I spent alone. Mike and my sister worked. Mike and I spent Friday cleaning and moving stuff from his old place. My aunt and uncle drove up from Atlanta on Friday. That's a very long trip for them. They're in their mid-70's. I'm not that old and driving down to visit is rough on me.

Saturday, my aunt and I finished the cleaning up the old place while Mike finished moving the boxes and other small items to the new one. On Sunday we rented the UHaul pickup again and started moving stuff from the garage to his new place. My uncle took care of Sarah on Saturday and Sunday for us to move Mike. So, here we are, my sister, my aunt, my ex-daughter-in-law, me, and Mike. We left my aunt and sister at his new place putting away the stuff Mike had moved on the car while me, Becca, and Mike used the U-Haul to move furniture. My sister and aunt were neither able to do that lifting. I had no choice but at least Becca came to help.

Sunday night I had to pay the piper. I had severe leg cramps in both legs and sciatica in my lower back, probably causing the cramps. I didn't sleep much, if any. I got up on Monday barely able to move. My aunt and uncle left around 7:30 and I took Sarah to school. I could barely walk I hurt so bad and although I was dressed for work, I called in sick and went back to bed. I spent most of the day lying on the sofa sleeping. My back was moderately better Tuesday morning.

As a result of all my efforts, I've been slammed with swollen hands, knees, and feet resulting from severe inflammation. RA at its worst crept up on me on Sunday night. My hands and feet felt as if they were stinging (the same feeling you get when you run water that is too hot on your hands) and painful to flex my fingers. . That's inflammation. I'm tired. I want to just curl up and go to sleep. I've been having an escalation of these issues for a few months now.

Instead, I went to work every day. Today I had an appointment with my RA doctor. She's going to give me a steroid pack and start me on metheltrixate. I see no alternative. I've tried to avoid it but I'm in such pain right now that it is just too much.

Today, I just want to come home and close my eyes. For several hours.

Upheavels

Sunday afternoon. I usually have a quiet afternoon with no company but David moved in this weekend. The divorce was final this past week and he had to move out. I spent Saturday afternoon and evening moving  furniture around, switching the study to the smaller room so he'd have a bigger room. The desk is huge and takes two people to disassemble, move, and reassemble. Then I had to reconnect all the electronics: computer, printers, modem, router, phone. I had problems with the internet on the desktop but the laptop worked fine so I don't know what caused it. It took a few hours for it to correct itself. Needless to say, today I'm in a very bad state. I think the weather may be partly responsible. It rained sometime during the night.

It was after midnight before I went to bed. This was because Sarah wanted to go "home". Sarah is with us this weekend as it is his weekend. She goes home tonight. It was difficult because she simply refused to go to bed. Normally, it isn't a problem but she no longer has her own room so it made it hard for her to know what to do. I'm going to have to do some additional shifting. I'm thinking the study will go back to the den/dining room. It was there, once, long ago before both the boys were grown. I liked it then. I'd like it again but I also want to be able to sew back there. At the moment, it looks like a Goodwill collection point. Of course he says he'll be getting his own place in a few months. I don't know. This job is a temp job and he as no idea what he'll do next.

So, this Sunday afternoon has been loud with cartoons, drums, and Sarah running all over asking questions, cooking a birthday lunch for Spot, and just being Sarah. I'm exhausted and in desperate need of a lie down.

David seems more his old self. I didn't really know why David became distant and cool to everyone. I'm still not really clear on what happened. Family members often commented on this fact but I didn't really see it. I do now. It is confusing. I'm not happy with the divorce. I'm glad he's more like my David but to me, divorce is a failure and not something to gloat about. I care very much about my daughter-in-law and I see a little girl who wants to go home to her "family" and can't. Ever. I see two people who got along well, who liked doing the same kind of things. I see a family forever changed. I see the ripples of a stone dropped in the lake.

Oh, I suppose many will say I am over reacting or I'm being overly dramatic about it. You go on. I'm a child of divorce. I never knew my father after the age of five and I have no memories save that of his leaving. I remember that day in high definition. It is always with me, just beneath the surface of other memories. I'm probably the only person left alive who remembers that day. Of course, David isn't going anywhere. Her mother isn't going anywhere. Her parents didn't marry just to insure legitimacy. They loved each other and they adore their child. Children don't know or care about these things. They only know who they love. But the effects of divorce are always there.

Prayers of Thanksgiving

Lots of my Christian friends have been doing the 30 days of thanks this month. I didn't elect to do it because I made another commitment and have limited my posts and time spent here. 

In my personal life I try to pray a prayer of thanksgiving everyday. On bad days I may pray a prayer of thanksgiving several times a day. I joked once that when I get in a hot shower I spend the first five minutes  of it saying Thank you God, for hot water. I may have said it jokingly but it is not a joke. I do it. If you hurt like I do, you pray the hot water never runs out. 

So, while I haven't posted a daily "thanks" post every day, I'm thankful for every day and this is how I generally pray on a daily basis. 

"O merciful and Holy God, 

Thank you another day of life. Thank you for every blessing and every trial. For through both you show us your care. 

Forgive us for our sins. Bless our nation with honorable leaders who exhibit integrity and honesty. Bless our people with a desire to seek truth in all our ways and demand integrity of those we have placed in charge of this nation.

Bless those who disagree with my beliefs and forgive those who belittle me for them. Forgive me if I have returned their actions in kind and help me not follow that path. Remind me if I stray and teach me good manners.

Keep me focused on right principles and help me to live what I believe without shame or fear. Give me the courage and strength to stand in the face of challenges to my faith and my character. Help me to always speak truth without shame, regret and without apology.

Let the love of God shine forth in my life. Remove all obstacles that block or dim that light. 

May I spread peace wherever I go. Let peace flow out of me to those who walk beside me. Let it follow in my wake to those who stay behind. And let peace flow ahead of me to those I have yet to meet. 

And let every word be established in the earth.

Amen"

How I Spent My Weekend

It was an insane Saturday. I was up at 7 a.m. and went to the hospital. I the ultrasound on my gall bladder, x-rays of my hands and feet, and they drew about 8 vials of blood. Then I dashed back across to the east side of town to take care of a bill. It was around 8:30 or  9. I stopped at Sonic for breakfast. My blood work and ultrasound had to be fasting so I was getting hungry. I turned around and went back to the west side, stopping at the house to pick up NaNo signs and continued on, picked up my first son so he could help me get some furniture I had seen beside the road for sale and bought. I headed back to the east side, stopping briefly to drop off said signs for a patron, before continuing to the far east side to pick up second son.

The three of us went north to Menards to rent the truck. We went west to my house to get the furniture (dresser, chest, and bunk beds for Sarah's room). We followed the owner to a second house on the south side to get the second bunk. He'd originally planned on keeping it but the room was just too small for a bed and sewing machine. On the way the mirror flew off and shattered on the road. Yes. We got the bed and went back to second son's house on the east side to unload truck.

We went back to my house to get my car, unload the mirror frame. I'm going next week to have the mirror that is sitting against a wall in my study installed in the frame. We once again headed north to turn in the truck, drop second son off on the east side, and first son and I came back to my house. He did several errands for me and then it was 6 p.m. when I took him home.

Second son, wife and Sarah came by around 8 to do up laundry in prep for his trip to Indianapolis for job training. He'll be there a week. I am praying this will be a good job for him and lead to other things. Pray for him with me please. He really needs a job that will allow him to provide for his family.

I got daughter-in-law to help in preparing my NaNo gift bags. I'm getting there but the minutia is just so tedious.

My feet have been hurting for about a week now, particularly the right foot. Previously, the left one acted up. It got better but it too is a bit sore. So far no one has offered a solution which makes me think there isn't one. This is not good. At its worst I can barely walk. If it gets worse, I'm in serious trouble. I live alone and I have to work. My house is not set up for wheelchairs or crutches. I couldn't do crutches anyway. I have too much shoulder and neck problems.

I sat up late after the kids left last night. I don't feel I've had a relaxing weekend at all. I overslept as a result and woke with a headache. The weather is gloomy but actually warm. I'm praying that the headache goes away.

I was unable to get the Imitrex because when the doctor rewrote the prescription she didn't say, "No generic". This hasn't been a problem before but I was under a different insurance. Anthem wants you to get generics only. I only get to non-generic medicines. This was a trial and error decision on my part. One is a patch that stays on a week. In the generic patches they don't stick. They won't replace a patch if you run short because it came off and you had to replace them. In the Imitrex, I did try a generic. I don't know what was different but I got really sick with it. This is a dangerous medicine and I don't feel like playing roulette with it. I'll call my doctor on Monday and ask her to resend the script. If she does, great. If she doesn't, that'd be bad. I'm not getting migraines as frequently but I still get them. The reduction is because I've been treating the neck and shoulder differently, making them the focus rather than the headache. I think I've proven the headache is a symptom rather than a cause.

Now it is Sunday and I overslept. I was looking forward last night to going to church this morning. I feel doubly bad because Mike misses when I do.

I'm supposed to got to David's to eat later. Becca called and asked me. I'm going to lie down again I think later and put up my foot.

I've got to actually start planning something to write in the event pantsing doesn't work. I actually like starting blank because my mind is forced to go in some direction of its own choosing. Those are the times when the story can get very intense and the characters start talking. Maybe it is because the want to talk and with no restraints they can do so more freely. I don't put expectations on them. I let them go where they want and say what they want and do pretty much what they want. Sounds like fun.

I'm going now. I've killed enough time. I've had my coffee, eaten breakfast, and read a bit. Now I can sit and listen to the clocks tick.