Junkyard

I am considering going back to work tomorrow instead of taking that day off. I took the long week with the plan that I'd be spending it with my family and doing things to get the house back in order. Neither is going to be the case. There is no family and the house won't be orderly for a month at least after this is over. They might be done with most of the outside today but I'm not sure. And there is a lot of little stuff to do out there.

My house is a nightmare that I can hardly deal with anymore. The stress of it is reaching critical proportions and I just need to be out of it. Just since Wednesday it has become even more of a mess. I should have left the laundry room alone but the inspector is coming tomorrow and it isn't good. I wanted to put the floor in there yesterday. I could have had it in. It is a 4x6 room, but they keeps telling me they'd get it. I need to do something constructive instead of watching it fall apart. Now, the washer is outside and I can't wash clothes or put anything that was in there away.

Three of us started cleaning the bath to see where things stood. The tub was covered by grout that was nearly impossible to get out because it had lain for three weeks. The drain was stopped up by grout. They've had to go under the house and take out the drain that Brandon put in and have to redo it. The floor is not good. Tile is not level. Brandon laid the floor. Grout is coming out around the unlevel tiles.Randy said he helped but my sister said she saw Brandon laying the floor.

I should have left the bathroom alone. I just had a hole in the tub that I was dealing with and now, I see other things that will be a bigger problem in the end. Cracks where they shouldn't be cracks, uneven tiles, grout coming out. And the plumbing a mess. And I've not even started to use it. I've had to take the pedestal sink back because it wouldn't work in that box of a bath. I have to find some kind of vanity or something. We should have been able to tell this at the first.

I'm really upset about the floor. I had a good floor in there, it was level because Jerry and I made it level and put vinyl on it. They ripped that up and put concrete backer board on it and the tile isn't level under the toilet area and in front of the sink. I got so upset when I saw it I just fell apart. I've spent a lot of money on this and that bathroom was the primary reason. It isn't right, any of it and I can't afford to do it over. I should have stepped in sooner and gotten rid of him. Randy assigned him jobs and so far what he was supposed to do has not been right.

I'm just so upset by the bathroom problems I can't think. I don't see NaNo happening. It is impossible to work in this mess, to think straight. My study is all over the house more or less in boxes. I am staying in my room as much as possible but even it is crowded and cluttered. To get 5000 words would be a miracle and 50,000 is beyond comprehension.

Saturday

I'm really frustrated. The house is total chaos and I don't have room to breath. We unloaded the laundry room and so there is even more garbage sitting around. I'm not sure what to do with anything. I can't just leave it all like this. I'm tempted to haul everything to the garage but it is so cold that I'd like to be able to park in the garage at some point after this mess is cleaned up. It is just madness.

So much so that my aunt and uncle are leaving today after lunch. I haven't even gotten to visit. I put 100 miles on my car yesterday just running around and I was so tired last night. They were exhausted, too, I think. I guess I should have canceled the whole thing but it just didn't occur to me.

I want my house cleaned up and I want this mess gone. I'm so tired of it and I still have no shower. That is the most frustrating thing. I don't feel like the bathroom will ever get done.

And now I think I need to get the floor in the laundry room ripped out so it doesn't have to be done later. It is horrible.

They whole place is horrible.

Good Morning Vacation

I am officially off for the next seven days. I'm on my way to pick up GFI plugs and some final things we need before getting started for the day. I hope I can pop back in later.

Did I tell you that I have a new front porch?

My Friday, Wednesday

I am at work...working hard to not think about five o'clock! The day before a break is always the worst. You can't start a big project because by the time you come back you will have forgotten. And small projects are tedious and often lead to huge ones you can't finish. So.

I'm having a rather mild pain day. I'm supposed to get a shot in my hip around noon. I don't know whether I want to or not. It isn't hurting much and so I'm hesitant. The shot hurts. I've taken my doxepin two nights in a row and slept fine. Dry mouth is the only issue I have with it. I keep water by my bed but since I don't wake up it doesn't help much. LOL, at least I'm sleeping. Rather well. If it would make me sleep this good all the time, it would be just fine. The effect seems to lessen over time so I'll have to see. For now, I welcome the sleep.

Everyone says I must do NaNo. I had no idea people could be so pushy! LOL, but I'll start it. I don't know if I'll finish it. If I can keep my head as clear as it is today, I might just pull it off. We'll see.

Oh, I'm so very tired of all the crap everywhere. I can't believe I'm having company this weekend! My poor aunt and uncle will be stunned at how crazy it is. I hope Saturday is a beautiful day because we could all be outside and spend the day together.

I went home at lunch and took Carolyn with me. I had to go see the porch. Oh my! It is going to be beautiful and such a HUGE porch! I can't believe it. My Sarah was there and hugged me and kissed me and showed me her red boots... "wellies" Jilly and Katey would say. They were just so cute and shiny. She will have a blast in them. Phyllis, my sister, bought them for her.

Everyone was on the porch when I got home. They were all so tickled about it. I gave Randy a hug. He grinned that toothless grin and said "You got your porch." He is just the best brother. Carolyn said it was a good decision to put the porch on it. I am amazed at how different my house look. It is amazing. I will get photos either tonight or tomorrow.

I went and got the shot in my hip. Hurt like. . . . well the devil knows. She used numbing medicine in it to keep the pain from the shot to a minimum but it was still horrible. However, it is numb at the moment. She said it might be a few days before the cortisone kicks in and if it doesn't work, we might have to do it again. It seems that sometimes the needle isn't long enough and the medicine doesn't get in the right place. Happened last time too.

Ok, I'm going now. Don't know when I'll be back. I'm taking my Doxepin around 6-7 p.m. so I get plenty of time to sleep it off. I'll be to bed by 9 or 10 at the latest. I can't wait to be able to sit on my porch! I'll bathe in the sink for that!

Tuesday, One to Go

I work one more day this week. I am hoping for a very productive week off. NaNo starts on Monday. I made the mistake of telling Doug I did not know if I was going to do NaNo. I am rather not into it at the moment. I do enjoy it but this construction has just thrown me off track. Anyway, when he found that I was off for the first two days of NaNo he replied, and I quote, "You have the beginning of NANO OFF!?!? HELL YEAH YOUR DOING IT!!!!" Like it or not, I think I'm doing it. Out of spite I threw down the gauntlet and he picked it up.

I hear the bathroom is nearing completion. Two people have called today to say Randy was working on it today. Since it stormed this morning he couldn't work outside so maybe the bathroom will be ready by Saturday? Actually, now I'm more excited about the porch...

I took a doxepin last night. Slept great. O.k. why do I always stop taking it? It does help me sleep well. I don't get any weird side effects except a craving for sweets... which I have generally anyway. I had only a little pain when I woke up. After about a week, the slight tired hangover will dissipate. I can't remember why I didn't take it... oh... I needed the SJW for depression. I don't take enough Doxepin to affect my mood. You can't take two different antidepressants. Still.... we'll see. I'll try and take it for the next three months and see what happens.

Home soon and across town to shower. Maybe I can do the spit bath thing tonight. That's where you bathe in the sink.... ugh. I hate it. I don't see how folks did that all the time way back when! I want a long hot shower or a long hot soak up to my neck!

Nearly time to go home now. I'm going to start getting things sorted and put away. May be back tonight. May not.

It Wouldn't Be Monday, Would It?

I was so sick yesterday. I had to take a Tramadol around 1 p.m. because my hip hurt so bad I couldn't stand it. I got terribly ill. I don't know if that is what made me sick but I thought I was going to throw up. I started sweating and my skin was clammy, I felt like I was going to throw up, and I had the shakes. Sounded like either insulin drop or peak. I felt terrible and around 6 I had Randy take me to the ER... where I waited.

I went in and told the girl I had blood sugar problems and that I might be having a diabetic reaction. She sat me down.. 30 minutes later, they came and got me, stuck my finger. Blood sugar was 97. Within normal limits. I went back and waited another 30 minutes. Then they did a blood draw from my arm. I was sent back for another 30 minutes. During this time the sweating and shaking subsided and the nausea calmed a bit but I still felt horrible. And I was exhausted!

At 8 p.m. they took me back and I sat for another half hour. The doctor came in and talked to me, they ran an EKG to rule out a heart attack, which had not occurred to me but the symptoms are the same. My EKG was just fine. I waited another 30 minutes and he came back. They wanted me to have a shot of phenegren but since the nausea was nearly gone why bother! I was sent home around ten o'clock.

I went home, still sick, and went to bed. I'm so tired today. My stomach is still not happy with anything. I am going to get some more metal to wrap the wood, get a shower at Becca's and then home to bed. I am so happy about my house but I wish I could be off to help more. But OH I wish the bathroom was done. LOL

Job Woes

Several have commented on my note about the coming layoffs at my office. To clarify, we got news yesterday that the boss must find a way to cut our spending immediately. I think he was given an ultimatum. "Cut your staff. NOW." Just a guess.

I've been expecting it for a couple of months now, ever since they began to drop people from the program. Fewer people getting housing assistance means fewer people employed to process it. This is the change they promised. Billions on stupid stuff and in foreign countries while housing for low income people is cut every year for Americans.

Now, with the Executive Director leaving it is not an unusual scenario. She was making way too much money since she's been here. I think they told her they would not continue to pay her =$100,000. She had an apartment she didn't pay for, she has health coverage. Worked an average of 4 days a week, leaving on Fridays to go back to her Illinois home and returning on Mondays. Cushy job that cost the taxpayers a bundle.

They would of course like for us to find other jobs. We were told to prepare our resumes and the boss would be happy to give us recommendations if we "didn't want to wait for the decision". He didn't say it but the truth is that would be easy for them. They wouldn't have to pay unemployment on several people at once. I will stay until they take the key to the back door.

There is no one near retirement. I'm one of the oldest in the department. There are a couple a few years older but most are under 50.

I appreciate any prayers you can garner on my behalf. I am immediately looking for ways to cut my spending until I know what will happen. If they lay me off, I would draw unemployment for a bit and I could substitute teach but there's no money in that at all. And the insurance I have is vital. Never mind that there are virtually NO jobs out there. Now would be a good time for that rich guy to knock on the door and say God sent him. LOL. Ok I have to make jokes here. Seriously, I don't want a rich guy... or any guy for that matter. I'd like Jerry to come home now. It won't happen. . . ever.

I don't find my self in a panic over the concept of no job. I think there have been so many blows in the last two years I just can't think about another one at this point. I sort of expect it, I guess. I'm sitting wondering why it took so long. I've managed to stay afloat because of my job. The thought of no job... it is just one more in a long string of bad things happening. They say when you hit bottom there is only one direction to go. I haven't hit it yet, I guess. I was kind of hoping for a ledge to break my fall.

More Problems 2

To install a weather head on the roof for the wiring the electrician has to replace my meter, run new wires, and said I can't have water within three feet of the electrical box. Makes sense. However, when I bought the house, the washing machine supply faucets were directly below my breaker box. I didn't put it there. A previous owner installed it before the codes were in effect. Now, I don't know if my water supply for the laundry room is going to be a problem and have to be moved as well.

Mike had a job for two weeks. He only worked twice. They fired him yesterday. He is in a spiral. Downward. I had to leave work and go to my house and make him go home. He was causing problems related to the people I had coming out for the electrical issues. This is the second time this week he's caused problems at the house. I feel bad for him about the job. But it wasn't a surprise to me. He's terribly disappointed and upset. I'm just tired.

I started the new medicine the doctor prescribed for me last week. It is Trazodone, an antidepressant he thinks will help me sleep. It doesn't work as good as my doxepin does. He says it is for the depression and to help me sleep. I may or may not take it. I am not supposed to take my skelaxin with it. I woke up hurting in my neck and shoulders because I didn't take the skelaxin. I don't know why I bother to go to the doctor. It is a waste of time and money.

I looked it up and it is a fairly mild A.D. but I'm not sold on its ability to help me sleep. It made me drowsy but Doxipen literally makes me fall asleep. Eventually, the effect decreases so I will be interested in seeing if this too decreases since it is not nearly as strong an effect as the other medicine. And the combination of Melatonin and Skelaxin makes me more sleepy that this stuff did. I took neither of those last night. I feel it this morning.

They are not going to be able to finish the roof in the back until this weather head is installed. So it will come to a standstill. I am hoping doing this rewiring may actually help with my utilities. If there are wires that are fused on the Vectren side, how do I know how that affects my power consumption? What idiots they are. They came and checked the line and on the places they found a break in the insulation and on the fused wires they simply taped it with electrical tape! I'll have to take photos of that.

O.k. I guess I have to get to work. I have a pain in my neck and sitting here is not helping. I may just go back to my regular medicines. This stupid to do this to myself.

More Problems

Randy just called to tell me that I need to call an electrician and have the wiring looked at where it goes into the house. He feels there is a risk of a fire if it isn't fixed. Apparently there are some melted wires for some reason. I have the power company coming to look at the line going in. The insurance adjuster told me that there was a line up there that the insulation was missing on and needed attention but what Randy found is another problem. Vectren will fix their lines but not mine.

So, another expense but certainly not unimportant. I guess it is better to get it fixed now than run the risk of losing my house. I'll feel safer with all this done. I'm just frustrated by it all. It was really getting bad I guess and we just didn't have any way to fix it. We never would have either.

On the House Top

Work on the roof began this morning before I got up. Could not find a comfortable position to sleep in and had to go take my sister to work at six. Her car didn't start again. She had it repaired yesterday. I am not sure what she will do. I paid her some money I owed her and that got it repaired but if it cost more I am concerned she can't get it fixed. It is an old car and she can't buy a new one.

After I got up and dressed we went and picked up the lumber necessary to attach the metal sheets to the roof and I just got back with that. It is a beautiful day in the neighborhood, sunshine is really glorious and the fall foliage is probably at its peak. It isn't going to be a long color season I don't think.

Right now it is 67F and perfect for sitting outside. I'm going to get Becca and Sarah in a few minutes. Dave is working out of town today at a concert. He has the part time job with a security company. It isn't enough money to live on but it is something.

Things are moving but still slowly. But then there are only two of them. I am hoping Becca will do some cleaning for me and help me get things a bit more orderly. I'm astounded at how very distressing it is. It is the first time in a long time I've actually felt better at work than home. Crazy.

I am taking photos today as things progress. I hope to have some of the new roof up by dark so you can see it won't look like a barn with this metal roof. For now, I'm going to get some laundry on. I am hoping to go to El Charro for lunch. Depends if I can get over there before three. I'd like to sit down and enjoy some time outside before it gets cold but I don't think I'll get it today. We'll see.

Late Night...Early Morning?

I'm going to bed. It has been a long day. I'm very pleased with the way the front of the house is looking. I can't believe how different it is going to look with the gable.

I must tell you a Sarah story. Her uncle Randy was going to sit down and eat tonight and he told her she could sit in the "princess chair" and eat, too. She patted the chair next to her and said, "And you can sit next to me." We were all amused at Her Royal Highness. No one has to tell this one where the power lies.

Randy got very tickled at her when he picked up a stuffed animal and handed it to her later. She told him she didn't want it because it's mother dressed it funny.

She is going to miss them when they are gone. She loves her uncle Randy and Brandon. If you check out the remodel album you can see she's got them wrapped around her tiny pinky.

Night.

New Photos Added

I added new photos of the work in progress in the remodel album. Here is the link:
Remodel - Thru Sunday 10/15/10

Friday, Too!

Another Friday has arrived. In fact, it is half gone. Here you see me in action. I am not sure how the weekend will play out but I truly need space and relaxation. I suspect I'll get more of what I've had for the last two weeks.

Progress is being made. I will take photos either tonight or tomorrow and post them. Randy planned to go home by Monday but he won't be done by then. Do say a prayer for him because he has had problems with his blood pressure this week and really wasn't able to do much for a couple of days. We were very worried about it. He forgot to bring his meds with him but I believe my sister-in-law mailed them and a few minutes ago he said they had come in the mail. I'm really glad. He is just working so hard and he never complains about anything.

I am going to stop for now. I'll try and get on later. Things have been a bit insane with us running all over to get showers. We still have no bathroom. LOL, but the roof and siding is going up really well. So, I'm fine ... well, I'm o.k.... well, I'm dealing.

Oh, the hip is a bit achy this morning. It was very cool last night and I had to turn on the electric blanket. Thank goodness for that! It helps a lot with achy joints but the hip is a bit rebellious. I'm using that medicine and if I can remember to keep putting it on throughout the day it might be even better.

I'm outta here for now! Look for photos soon!

On Top of It?

The roofing is to be in today. It rained yesterday. So, I hope that with that done, they can get the roof on and the rest of the siding up. The weather is supposed to cooperate and if the rest of the universe will, we may get this thing finished.

I've been doing the 4x a day thing with the Pennsaid as the doctor instructed. The pain in knees, leg, hip, and neck seem to be a better, particularly the hip. I'm telling you on Saturday I wanted to be put down like an old nag. The weather is damp this morning but I'm not in a tremendous lot of pain.

I have to pick up the new medicine tonight. I may not take it until tomorrow night since I do now know how it will work. I can't afford to miss work because I over slept.

Everything is, of course still a mess but there are areas I've managed to regain some slight order and that has helped me emotionally. I've been surprised with myself about that. I'm worse than even I thought. No wonder David is so OCD! And Mike! Poor Sarah, we see tendencies in her as well but she has two OCD parents so it doesn't bode well for her.

I was going to blog last night and do a video blog but I just didn't feel like doing it. By the time I got home from my shower, I was ready to hit the sack. I'll be getting more photos soon of the progress. I did post a new challenge. For October any Challenges I post will they will tend to be Halloweeny.

I have to go to work now. I am so glad it is Thursday. I am eagerly awaiting Friday. And Saturday will be greeted with great excitement.

As one governor once said, "I will be back."

A Dog's Mistake (In Doggrerel Verse) by A. B. Paterson

He had drifted in among us as a straw drifts with the tide,
He was just a wand'ring mongrel from the weary world outside;
He was not aristocratic, being mostly ribs and hair,
With a hint of spaniel parents and a touch of native bear

He was very poor and humble and content with what he got,
So we fed him bones and biscuits, till he heartened up a lot;
Then he growled and grew aggressive, treating orders with disdain,
Till at last he bit the butcher, which would argue want of brain.

Now the butcher, noble fellow, was a sport beyond belief,
And instead of bringing actions he brought half a shin of beef,
Which he handed on to Fido, who received it as a right
And removed it to the garden, where he buried it at night.

'Twas the means of his undoing, for my wife, who'd stood his friend,
To adopt a slang expression, "went in off the deepest end",
For among the pinks and pansies, the gloxinias and the gorse
He had made an excavation like a graveyard for a horse.

Then we held a consultation which decided on his fate:
'Twas in anger more than sorrow that we led him to the gate,
And we handed him the beef-bone as provision for the day,
Then we opened wide the portal and we told him, "On your way."


I like poetry. I was reading it as a child, began writing some by the time I was a teenager, and to this day, I still love reading it. I ran across this poet looking for something else. He writes about Australia. He is probably best known for "The Man from Snowy River" and the Australian anthem "Waltzing Mathilda". Here is a link to a site containing other poems by him.

A. B. "Banjo" Paterson Poetry

Lunch Break

Just went by the house on my lunch break with my friend, Carolyn. She loves the gable. The siding is looking really good. They took out the front window. If you go to the albums you will see a window on my breezeway on the wall between the garage and door. This window is now gone. I have a new door about to be put in with a window in it, with built in blinds. So, I'll still have a window on the front but more wall space inside.

There is something about a new door on a house that is so exciting. I can't explain it. I like new doors. I loved putting in the door we had on the back of the house. And the new door on the main entrance, which has no lites or windows of any kind. If I ever replace that door, it will be something fancy now that I'll have that nice gabled entry.


The old back door was known as a cross-buck door = window in the top and a cross panel on the bottom. (photo on the left)

The two new doors are the same except no cross buck design, rather a inset panel design that will better match the front door and of course the above mentioned window panes. (photo on the right).

The tile in the bathroom is nearly done. There were a few problems with some of it. I'm not thrilled with the way I had it done but it is what it is. I'm getting a plumber to install a new faucet on my sink. The old one is shot but the new one is exactly like it. If I ever get the kitchen done, that is one thing less that I'll need.

So, that is the the way things stand at the moment. More as the situation develops.

Is it Only Tuesday?

Good grief, what happened to the weekend? O.k. I am a mess. I haven't had enough sleep. This morning I had a doctor's appointment and lab work where, as usual, they had trouble finding a working vein. How is it possible to be walking around with blood flowing and they still have to resort to making a pin cushion of of me to get an ounce of blood?

My doctor is giving me a new medicine to help me sleep. Some kind of mood altering thing. Says I'm depressed and anxious. Give the man a blue ribbon. Sometimes I really don't like my doctor. Probably means he's fairly good at his job.

No, it isn't finished. They have started putting siding up. And the gable is almost done. The roofing is ordered and supposed to be in on Thursday. I have two new doors going in today and two new windows in the den. One window is coming out. Since the door will have a window I won't miss the one we remove. And I'll have another wall to utilize. That room has no unbroken walls so placing furniture is a pain. Now, I'll have one long wall with nothing but a door in it.

I am not feeling good at all. I hate all this running after work. I went home and put away two weeks of laundry. Mopped the floors I could get to because they were a mess and I can't stand it anymore. I'll have to take off to do anything about real cleaning. But, I get my birthday off this year and I am taking the 29th as well. I just asked Marques and he said it was fine. So, with that to look forward to, maybe I can accomplish some things at home.

All right, time to get to the real work. Break is over.

Monday Madness

I came to work exhausted. What a weekend! And the work isn't over.

I think I have to go buy the doors today and windows for the den. They are installing siding today. The gable is finished. They were working on the bathroom, too. I ordered the roofing material and it will be in Thursday. Yes, progress but still my house is a debris field after an atomic blast. I'm hurting all over. I'm not getting enough sleep because I am having to go get a shower somewhere else. It is nearly 10 before I get home after three of us shower.

I still have a headache. I don't know why. Tired, tramadol, stress, nerve pain, muscle pain? Whatever. I'm not going to be fit for NaNo if I don't start getting enough rest. I need a week of nothing.. no worries, no stress, no bother.

I may take another weekend away somewhere.... with a heated indoor pool.

Word for the Day

Necessitarianism - The theory that every event is determined by causal necessity and that the actions of the human will is not free, but is caused by previous actions and experiences.




It is a word. I read it in my Webster's Dictionary. I assure you it is a very good dictionary. Has everything in it... well up to 1978. But just look how many words that is...

FRIDAY!

I need a sound bite here. One long howling scream. That might convey my feelings far better than a blog post. I'm really not handling any of this well. See, I can't get away from all the debris and disorder. There is an elephant on my chest and he won't get off.

I tossed and turned last night, rethinking my whole decision to rip out a fairly good bathroom I only needed a tub, really. I am so stressed about everything. I don't know if any of this is a good idea. Everything is upside down. The bathroom seems like a total wreck. Of course it isn't finished but mentally, that isn't registering. Will I really like this change? What if I hate it?

The awning is lying in the front yard. The living room was freaky this morning because it was so light in there! Took me a minute to figure it out. Can't believe how dark it was for so long. I never thought much about it. It just was. With the window opened, the room looks totally different... and junky. I'm going to get new living room furniture as soon as order returns. I'm junking everything, I think. There is too much debris in my life.

I hope at some point this will be funny. I doubt it.

The Insanity of It All

There are far too many people around. My house is utter chaos. Everything is crazy, upside down, inside out, topsy turvy. It is so stressful that I almost would rather be at work!

Tile began going up today. It really looks nice. Randy stopped tiling around lunch because he wanted me to decide how high I wanted the decorative band. He also added a touch of his own. Diamond shaped tile above and below the band. I think it will look really pretty. He can cut the large tiles into four squares and turn the squares onto a point and line them up.

Watching all this I realize how very talented he is. There is no waste and he takes great care in his work.

Once the bathroom is done, they can work on the roof and siding and I can clean this mess up inside. I so need to get rid of a ton of junk!

We resolved the cabinet in the bath problem. My floor to ceiling hall cabinet will be modified. The bottom half of the cabinet will be divided and closed off. Half of it will open into the bath for towels and wash cloths and other items. The other half will open into the hallway and continue to be home to my bedding. This is an ideal solution using space that is already used but more efficiently.

I'm getting ready to turn in now. I've had a long day and evening. I will be glad when we can get a bath without having to leave the house.

Second Day of Demolition

I am on my way to bed. I'm exhausted. We had a few snags today. We had to go buy a new window, a sink, and get a different tile. I decided to do a color change. I will still have to buy paint. I bought a new light fixture and still have to buy the exhaust fan.

I also had to get faucets for the tub. The old ones were worn out. I still have a leak in the second toilet. I think the seal is worn out. We'll get a new one tomorrow.

The insurance adjuster came out and looked at the roof. I have enough to pay for the stuff to do the roof. Randy and Brandon will put that on for me. The metal roof is out as no one does the metal sheets for do it yourselfers. But that's ok too.

I'm all "het" up about this disarray. I can't stand the confusion of everything everywhere and dust coating everything. The effort needed to clean it will be herculean!

The green "rock" is up and waiting for the tile to go up. The window and tile will go in tomorrow. I really can't wait to see it.

Getting rid of the debris is a problem. I haven't figured it out yet and must by the time they start on the room.

It is midnight. Morpheus is calling.

The Walls Came Tumbling Down

The walls are down. Tomorrow they begin work clearing nails from the studs and working on getting ready to put in the green drywall. This is mold and mildew resistant "rock". The backer board is also. The floor was in better shape than we thought but we found the nest the mice built. And a dead mouse so the poison I put out worked.

I suspect they will get a lot done tomorrow. The claims adjuster will be here tomorrow to look at the roof. Randy will talk with him about the roof.

We are running the tile right to the ceiling. I just want as little maintenance as possible in there and I think that will be the best way to deal with it. The moisture level can get high and the tile will help with that, I think. There is no insulation in the outside wall and he will be putting that in there as well, so the warmth factor should be better.

Dust coats everything, even though I closed the bedroom doors I found dust on the headboard, night stand, and floor. So, it is a safe bet the bed was coated. I will change the sheets tomorrow. Tonight, I'm headed for bed. I wish I could be around to see how it goes but I'll check in at lunch.

We went to Dave and Becca's to shower and visit for a short time. Miss Sarah flirted shamelessly with Brandon, my step nephew. He is such a nice young man. Brandon seems to still be a good boy. I've only seen them maybe three times in the last 15 years and I think the older boy has gone off the rails a bit and so has the younger daughter. I was talking about the backyard camping trip we all had on the Labor Day weekend when Princess Diana died. We were at my mother's, all of us and our children, my aunt and uncle - a passel of about 15 people. We camped in her backyard, cooked out and just had a good time hanging out. The kids all played well together. Brandon, the middle child, was seven at the time and he's 20 now. He told me he remembered it and from the sound of his voice I think it was a good memory. I'm glad. I always loved those children. Those days will never come again so it is nice if he has good memories of it.

Lights out now. I will be posting photos eventually. And more as the project progresses. If things continue to move this fast, it won't take three weeks. Brandon says he can't wait to get on the roof. He likes roofing. I can't wait for the whole thing to be completed. I can't stand the chaos of stuff everywhere! I feel hemmed in by it but there is not alternative.

Sunday Passing

I'm tucked up in my bed waiting for my brother to arrive. I expect, barring delays, that he will get in around midnight. That's late for me. I am going to have a rough day of it tomorrow.

I should apologize for the depressing posts I've been putting up. Maybe I should close those off. I don't like them myself. I hate revealing all that at times. But from the beginning of this whole mess I felt it was very important for other people to see the reality of this process. Most of the time, we never get even a glimpse of it. I never had a clue. Now that I do, I can think of so many people I might have dealt with differently had I realized. The woman at work who's husband died a couple of months ago and I have talked quite a lot. One day I told her for months after Jerry died, I would put my face in his clothes hanging in the closet because I could still smell him on them. She started to cry and blurted out, "I did that!" After she regained her composure, I apologized for upsetting her. She said, "No, I thought I was the only one and I thought it was crazy!"

I've decided to take off to go get the tub, tile, and other stuff in the morning. I also have to get the permit based on the cost of materials. I can do that on my own. My brother will have to go with me to get the materials. I picked everything out yesterday.

I can't believe it is happening. I keep expecting to wake up and it all be a nice dream with no substance.

I'm tired and maybe I should try an sleep for a while until they arrive. They will be so tired but tomorrow is only one day. I suspect when they get started, it will be a whirlwind of activity.

I went to church tonight with Mike and Sarah. She is just such a joy. We went to McDonald's after church, of course, and while we waited for Mike to bring our food she smiled at me and said, "You're my best buddy." When I dropped her off at home she called, "Come get me Thursday." LOL, we have no idea why Thursday.

I've got my NaNo account updated and ready to roll. I need to start outlining my idea so I've got something to work with. I suspect I'll have time in the evenings but with two males in the house who knows.

I've never lived with this brother since he was a kid. And that was only briefly when Jerry and I were living with my mother and four of my siblings to help her make ends meet. He was a funny kid but rather quiet as kids go. That or I was just an older married sister too busy to notice him. I hope not.

At any rate, both my sister Phyllis and I are thrilled he is coming. She's going to help me feed them by cooking. Becca said she will come over and cook, too. I know that sounds silly but I don't expect them to eat the way I do. I don't eat at night! They'll be hungry with all this work. And I won't be home all day. So, they'll need someone to help with that.

I think I will call it a night. I'm really tired.

Voluntary Prison

I am home from church and sitting on the sofa in my pj's. It is a of and on sunny day and the temp has risen to 58 degrees. I thought about going to Kohl's and look for a new shirt. I considered putting on street clothes and walking shoes and going to the cemetery and walking. It is a nice cemetery and people often use it to walk. The paths are paved and there is a variety of hills, levels and curves in the narrow roads throughout the grounds. You could easily walk more than two miles. I followed neither urge. My hip has become nearly unbearable when I walk.

On the way home today I had two realizations. One, dreams do not come true. It is a lie... not a myth. A lie. Two, I realized that I really no longer want to leave my house. I do not like getting in the car and leaving the yard. I cry when I leave and cry when I come home. I cry at the thought of going out of the house every morning to my job. I cry when I get up. I cry when I go to bed. I manage to get through my work day without falling apart but I'm so tired when it is over. I just want to go home and not come out again.

I don't like going out and seeing how very empty the rest of the world is and how pointless it is. I didn't like shopping before, now I detest stores. At least, I can sit outside here if the weather is nice but it is too cold for me today and will probably remain so for six months. So I'll stay in my voluntary prison. It will be a fairly nice prison once all the repairs are completed.

I don't think as much when I'm here. I watch a lot of old t.v. shows and lie around. I'm so tired most of the time I can't do much more than that anyway. Half a day of cleaning house and I'm done for on any given day. Right now I feel exhausted and I'm still not done with getting things ready for house guests. I have felt this way for a few days now. But when I go to bed, I don't rest. There is no position in the bed that doesn't hurt and so my sleep is never very good.

I'm tired. I already said that but it is true.

Solitary Sunday

I'm just getting read to go out the door. I can't get anyone on the phone to go to church with me so I will be going alone. I do hate it but I can't do anything about it. Mike probably will sleep all day. Dave and Becca turn their phones off so I can't call and ask them. I did ask him last night if I could take Sarah and he said yes but I didn't believe it when he said it. But I still asked. I tried twice to call both phones. They don't want to hear it and so turning off the phones is a way to avoid the request. I don't get people who don't have the courage just to say no to your face rather than lie to you.

I don't think I slept well. Woke with feet, knees, hands, and neck hurting. It was cold in the house. I don't know what it got down to last night but it is currently 54 at 9 a.m.I guess I'll have to break out the electric blanket so I won't ache so much.

What am I going to do it this gets any worse? There isn't anyone to rely on for anything.

At the Starting Line

Get ready, WriMos! Thirty day and the fun begins. Yes, folks, 30 days! WriMos everywhere are beginning to sharpen their pencils, create folders on their hard drives, stocking the larder with all manner of cookies, crackers, chocolate, assorted candies, cocoa, and coffee. I still have some of Word's special brew in the pantry waiting for the cold nights of November. The first of November will see a skyrocketing purchase of snack veggies and fruits.

I dropped in this morning and found that the boards have been wiped. The forums are open. Don't forget to go update your profile with your time zone, participant/winner info, and download those lovely badges to show off on your email and websites.

If you have never participated in 30 days of madness, I encourage you to give in and try it. Anyone who loves to write should try NaNo once. You'll be hooked for life and discover a lot about yourself. Of course you'll make lots of friends along the way, too.

So, keep your eyes on this spot. The madness begins November 1st.

Downhill

I'm on the down side if Friday. I'm so glad. I've worked all day in my office moving furniture and cleaning. I'm done with most of the heavy stuff but still have two file cabinets to move and tons of stuff to get rid of.

We do not have maintenance men to do our moving. We have to do it ourselves. This means you have to know how to use a screwdriver and be able to move 100 lbs. I've been on the floor on my back beneath my desk most of the day. First taking it apart. Then, moving it. Then putting it back together. I will get photos for you all next week. I like it this way actually.

I had my desk in front of the window when I first got this office and moved the desk to a corner. It was hard to see the screen and I had to face the window. You can see photos of my office before today's change in layout in the albums. Actually, my keyboard tray won't work in the right place this time either but I'll rig something later for that. The other reason I wanted it moved was I hated my back to the door. My boss never knocks and I'm not allowed to shut my door. So he is eternally coming up behind me. I hate it. Of course he goes through our desks, too. Everyone knows it but there isn't much we can do about it. Not sure what his purpose is.

Anyway, it is almost time to go home and I'm going to finish it up. It was so very dusty and dirty in here. Our vacuum doesn't work well either. The wheel keeps falling off. I could bring mine from home for a day but don't see why I should be responsible for bringing my own equipment to clean their offices.

I'll pop in later. I'm so happy it is Friday! I hope I do not feel all this moving tomorrow!

Friday Has Arrived

I woke at my usual time, 6:30 a.m., to my clocking telling me it was my usual time. I got up, stretched, to the snap, crackle, ouch and mentally sent out scouts to determine where I was on that funny scale of faces they use in the doctor's office. I don't have one here but I think.....I am about ready to head out to work so we will see how the morning goes. I really need to get to bed and rest tonight so I can get up tomorrow and get things in order. I am so excited that my brother is coming up. I so want my house repairs done.

The writer's meeting went well last night but I hate I was so sick. I felt as if I wasn't able to put my best into it. But it was nice to sit and talk to my friends and share some of their excitement.
I hope everyone has a productive Friday. My Brit friends are already well into their Friday and it will be almost Saturday there by the time I get home. I may pop in later today if I find myself taking a break but. . .