MIddle of . . . .

That implies that something is halfway. That's be a nice thought if the something is unpleasant. My faith is strained these days and so I doubt that anything is at the halfway point. And some things you would probably not want to be halfway done.

I got up when the clock went off at 6:30. Back hurts but not miserably so. Knees are minor. Neck... maybe that's minor, too.

I've discovered several seeming truths. Everything hurts all the time at varying degrees. Also, sometimes pain in my heart and mind hurt far worse than any physical pain I could have. There is a correlation between that pain and the other pain and sleep. This is a thing I can't fix apparently.

I am trying to get my sleep back on track because for some reason it got out of sync again. I don't know how. Probably didn't sleep well at some point and I didn't realize it for what it was and let it go too long. Could have been when I was having the panic attacks and had several sleepless nights. Months ago I was doing pretty good and felt fairly well most days, with bouts of severe pain.

I think, and think is the operative word here, I think my brother(s) is(are) coming up to remodel my bathroom. He does brilliant work. And I could pay him to do it and I don't think he'd charge me what these yahoos are wanting for it. If I can cut corners somewhere and still get the quality material and workmanship that'd be really good. My brother, the second boy, is a brilliant builder. His work is beautiful. I've never been able to get him to come up but it is a long way. So, pray about this for me.

It is a gloomy day. I see sunlight but not very bright. It is getting up later than I am these days. And going to bed earlier. Winter is crouching at the door. I dread the utility bills. They are already raised again. I do not see how this company can do this every six months. People will be homeless because of it. It is simply criminal. My bill this past month was $160. I'm not home 8 hrs a day. I keep the temp when I am home on 76-77. It is on 80 when I'm not here. No light run but those in my room. I don't watch television except on the computer. I take one bath a day of about 15 minutes. I don't cook.

I'm going now to get breakfast and go to work. Today is move briefing and thankfully, I don't have to do it. Someone else is but I have to set up the equipment. Overhead projector, computer, and screen.