We consider the modern printing press the greatest invention of all time. It revolutionized the processing of written material for mass consumption. The printing press ensured all people would have access to the Word of God. This drove people to learn to read and write. With an educated populace, ideas and inventions grew from a thought to blue prints. The Enlightenment happened because someone created a machine to print ideas.
I had a great aunt that lived in the country on a farm in the Florida Panhandle. We used to visit on holidays or other special events. Our family reunion was always at her house around Thanksgiving and included at least100 people throughout the day, some of whom were ex-wives, step-children, neighbors and friends. It was an amazing event, and I loved it as a kid. We all did! When my aunt died, we were all saddened. No one could step into that gap.
I know. I know. What does that have to do with a printing press? I'll tell you if you give me a second.
We lived close enough to my aunt to drive over in a couple of hours, and that's usually what we did. I never remember spending a night at her house. Except once. I couldn't have been over 5 or 6. The sensation of being small remains.
When it came time to prepare for bed, Mama told me it was time for a bath. We went to the bathroom, and she closed the door. When I turned around, I realized there was no bathtub.
"Mama, how am I going to bathe? There's no bathtub."
She picked up a white porcelain pan trimmed with a red rim and said, "We're going to get a spit bath."
Now, I don't know if I said anything else. I don't know what expression was on my face. I can tell you that my recollection is sketchy but I distinctly recall a feeling of "Oh no we're not."
But we did, and my gaze kept going to where the tub should be. Right then I am pretty sure I was thinking the bathtub was the greatest invention of humanity.
These days I prefer a shower. Every night when I get a shower I stand under the water and thank Jesus for hot water. Really. My aching bones, muscles, and joints revels at the thought of the streams of steaming water running over them.
Tonight I thought about this. I thought about the printing press and Aunt Minnie's bathtubless bathroom. And I realized they got it wrong.
The greatest invention of all time is the hot water heater.
